Clever Little Detective
There’s a strange shift that occurs when you settle in.
In my thirty-two years on this rock,
I haven’t been able to see it coming.
Well, maybe I did once or twice,
But I unquestionably lacked the strength to remain positive and
Morph into a healthier me.
Sure, cells were dying and being reborn,
And I was too.
But whatever my current model was,
It lacked the capacity to restructure when it mattered.
Again, when it should’ve been concerned with positive growth.
But every time,
It went the other way.
It drove itself toward destruction.
Maybe it knew it needed to rebuild
And this was the design, or pre-programmed process?
The default setting.
That shift,
It’s two becoming one.
Distinct, sure.
But united.
Two members of the same team.
There’s a common goal.
That shift,
It requires trust to sustain its new form.
A re-prioritization
Or
At least
A new consideration of the other’s primary goals.
There’s an analysis.
Plus and minus.
Priorities are deleted or altered
Solely to create a list of
Alternatives that will serve the vital objectives of both teammates.
But it requires trust.
I have destroyed myself rather than grant that trust.
Every time.
The programming is encoded.
And I haven’t
The faintest fucking idea
What the decryption key
Looks like
Or sounds like
Or tastes like.
And somewhere,
Comically enough,
There’s a tiny component
- Something cute with a smile that melts your heart -
Encouraging perseverance.
A clever little detective
Living in the fourth dimension,
Who smiles from everywhere
Because it knows
Everything is right where it belongs.
